“…hold on to this box, lest the pumpkin goblins grab them all.”

Thus reads the warning at the end of the side-of-box copy on Trader Joe’s Pumpkin-O’s.

Of course, I wrote a book called Pumpkin Goblins, so this was hilarious to me. My partner and I discussed whether we thought the pumpkin goblins would actually steal someone’s Pumpkin O’s. I said, no, they wouldn’t. They’re professionals. They won’t mistake a cereal for a real pumpkin. Pumpkin sense goes deeper than eyesight.

He said, yes, they would, but not when they’re on duty.

The Little Engine That Could is female! And so is the red engine who breaks down on her way to bring toys and food to children. I didn’t remember this book well, so I was surprised to find this out when I started reading it to my toddler.

Incidentally, all three engines who refuse to help are self-important dudes. Well, one of them is actually an old, tired dude. His depression-era exhaustion makes me sad.

It makes me wonder if there is an intentional message hidden in the Dude-Engines’ unwillingness to help with the female task of making sure children are taken care of.

The president of the college where I work and the governor of the state were supposed to come through my office today. One of my first thoughts when I heard they would be coming was basically, “I’d better make sure to have my best playlist on.”

BECAUSE THEY ARE IMPORTANT PEOPLE.

And because they would notice that? Sure. Sure, they would.

They turned out not to be the actual visitors, but I still think putting on your best playlist is good etiquette.

https://www.missinformationblog.com/neelys-homemade-bbq-sauce/?m

I needed a quick bbq sauce recipe that didn’t involve chopping onions. My eyes have become sensitive to the point that chopping half an onion means I need to flee two rooms away for a ten-minute crying break.

The only change I made to this one was to replace the Tabasco sauce with sambal oolek, and quadruple it.

After I made that change, I looked up both hot sauces’ values on the Scoville heat scale. Since I think of Tabasco as a more vinegary sauce, I was surprised that it has a higher value than sambal oolek.

“If I listen to a playlist of children’s new wave songs about trucks at work, will anybody notice?” That’s the question my partner and I have been wondering about (more me because of the nature of my job) now that our kid is obsessed with this song about a cement mixer. Like a disease, it has spread to everyone around her. We all have it stuck in our heads. It goes round and round and round and round…

If this had existed when I was in high school, it’s exactly the kind of thing I would’ve binged-watched just because it’s weird.

You know the scene in Avatar: The Last Airbender when Azula goes to recruit Tai Lee the acrobat for her elite team of fighters by having the ringmaster release all the animals and setting the net on fire?

I think that’s what a 401k is?